Are You Able to Forgive?

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Are you walking around angry with someone and just not dealing with it?  By not speaking to them, are you really not dealing with it?  Every day you may be thinking about it.  Every day it is festering inside of you.  Then when you see the person, the feelings surface again.  Therefore, you may THINK that you are pushing it to the side.  You may THINK by not talking to that person that you are not dealing with it.  However, by making that decision that is how you are choosing to deal with the situation. 

I know it is much harder to just speak nicely to that person, say hi, or smile.  Nonetheless, this is something that you must do.  At first, when you smile you may not mean it and that is okay.  Yet the more you do it, the easier it becomes.  Then before you know it all that angst, anger, and resentment is gone.  Then you feel so much better.  The first time I put this practice in place, I was amazed how good I felt afterwards.  I felt so much better, by letting it go, truly letting it go.  My soul was renewed and refreshed.  By forgiving that person, you are forgiving yourself.  Besides that person may not even know they have wronged you.  However, you are all upset and for what?  For nothing.  They are living their life not thinking about you.  So why are you thinking about them?  Let it go.

For example, you do not know that person that cut you off while driving.  Nevertheless, you get angry and may start calling them names, etc.  Then you go to work and tell somebody about it and get all worked up again.  You do not even know who that person is!  This is such wasted energy.  Your time is too valuable to be spent on such insignificant conversations.  In addition, your health is affected and can manifest in headaches or high blood pressure.  

Just sit back for a minute and look at the situation.  Is all the ill will worth it?  Do you feel better by talking badly about someone?  On the other hand, are you causing stress on your body?  Is your blood pressure rising?  Are you defaming someone’s character?  Don’t you know that words can kill…literally?  They cannot only kill you but they can kill others.  We read all too often about kids committing suicide due to cyber bullying.  My first post was about the power of words.  We have such power and do not even realize or comprehend it.

You have to realize that what you portray outwardly, affects you internally.  Perhaps it is human nature to be upset for that moment in time.  However, this is when we need to learn to control our emotion – to be in control of who we are and of our life.  To make our life abundant and healthy, we must learn to forgive.  Numerous things that go wrong in our lives are a result of us not being able to forgive.  People often-go crazy and become obsessed because they cannot forgive.  While it is not always an easy thing to do, it is a skill that can be acquired and one that definitely needs to be practiced.  Once you are able to do it, it is a blessing.  It is a blessing to you and the people around you because it begets a good-natured spirit and a healthy life.    

Please understand if you cannot forgive someone else, then you cannot receive your blessing.  You see, you are blessed so that you can be a blessing to someone else.  Therefore, learn to forgive so you can receive your gift and your blessing and be the person that you were meant to be!

Are You Living in the Moment?

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Do you rush from day to day or week to week?  When it’s Wednesday are you thinking, “Oh, it’s two more days until Friday!”

Why are you rushing and wishing your days away?  What is the hurry?  What are you doing with your life that prevents you from taking the time to breathe?

We are given a gift everyday…to start anew, to be refreshed, to inspire someone, to encourage someone, to live to our full potential, to be a blessing in someone’s life, and to learn.

We were put here for a purpose – not to waste our time, not to hurry our time, but to live in our time.  Many of us worry because we are thinking about the next hour, the next day, the next week or the next month.  Moreover, we do not really appreciate what we have right now.  As this minute goes by, we will never have it again.  We will never be able to live this moment again.

Think of all the minutes you have wasted.  All the time you have spent on needless worry or things out of your control.  Tomorrow is not promised to any of us.  Therefore, the future is a gift.  So live in the present.

Enjoy life.  Think of it as your favorite ride at an amusement park.  It could be from when you were a kid or even now.  Remember the excitement you had and that you never wanted it to end.  If you were like me, you always thought the ride was too short.  Well, the only difference between that ride and your life is that you only get to stand in line once – you only get one ride.

Therefore, if you knew this was your last ride and you could never ride again, would you act differently?  Would you savor each moment while you were on the ride?  Would you take in the view if you were up high and try to remember it all?

Now you may be saying life is much more complex than an amusement park ride.  However, is it?  Life is what you make it.  What you create in each moment is uniquely yours.  Every minute you are creating and enhancing your ride, your journey.

Therefore, why would you ever want to rush your favorite ride before it was over?  When you think about it that way, it does not make sense to rush from minute to minute.  Slow down, watch the sunrise, read a book to your child, call your mother, talk with your best friend (not text), take a walk with your significant other or take a yoga class.

Whatever you do, be present.  Do not miss the beauty of your life.  Live in the moment and you will stop wishing for tomorrow.

What is Your Purpose?

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Have you ever felt like you were missing something?  Do you wake up each day and desire more in your life?  Is that voice inside telling you that you were made for something other than what you are doing?

We all have heard people say, “We all have a gift or a purpose.”  You may believe that or choose not to believe it.  However, if you sometimes feel like you could be doing something more with your life, then you probably have not reached your full potential.  You have not realized your purpose.

Many people may recognize their talent or gift but are afraid to act upon it.  They do not realize that their gift was meant to be shared and not hidden.  The dictionary defines a gift as something given willingly to someone without payment, a present.  When you know your purpose, your focus is singular.  The path is clear and your spirit and mind are aligned. 

Now that is not to say that the way or path is easy.  As we know, nothing worth having in life comes easily.  We are constantly confronted with obstacles like fear.  Fear can be debilitating.  Fear can cause you to give up your dream.  Fear can keep you from becoming your true self.  However, you must know that fear is self generated.  We let it in when we doubt, worry, or procrastinate.  

If you understand nothing else in your life, you must understand your true self.  Our purposeful life begins when we realize who we are, why we are here and what we must do.  Some of us realize our purpose as children others as adults.  However, when you acknowledge your purpose is not important.  It is when you discover that purpose that is significant. 

Do not let another day go by without moving toward your purpose.  I heard someone once say, “To become ourselves is the challenge of adversity”.  Simply put, we are the ones standing in the way of us fulfilling our purpose. 

Let go…and become who you were meant to be.

If You Had a “Do Over” Button, Would You Use It?

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Often times we do something or make a mistake and wish we could do it over.  How many times have you said something and as the words were leaving your mouth, you already wish you could take them back?  How easy life would be if we had a “Do Over” button…

We would never make any mistakes.  There would never be any “accidents”.  We would always get 100% on tests and quizzes.  We would never offend anyone.  We would always be on time…or late depending on where you were going.

For most tense and purposes, things would always go smoothly for you.  But what would you learn?  How to be a “perfectionist”?  What struggle would you go through?  What kind of character would you build?  How would the people around you treat you…a perfectionist?  Would they view your perfection as “annoying” or would they see you as you would see yourself?  Would you be happy?

Life is not easy for a reason.  We all need to grow and learn.  That is why we do not come out of our mother’s womb as an adult.  That is why everyday is not filled with sunshine.    We need it to rain in order for us to appreciate the sunshine.  We need to fall, so we know how to get back up.  We need to crawl before we walk. 

We would not be who we are today if we could just erase everything that was not “perfect” in our lives.  If we could just “Do Over”, when would our real life begin?  Would we even be living or would we just be reacting?

Life is not meant to be perfect, it is meant to be lived – lived and learned.  Everything that I have done in my life has made me who I am today.  So if I had a “Do Over” button, I would not use it.  Would you? 

To Risk or Not to Risk?

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Have you ever taken a risk?  I was recently talking to a friend who began seeing someone who was not her “ideal” man.   She abandoned all of her “criteria” and is enjoying her time with this person.  She took a risk.

Risks come in all different forms from dating someone new, to quitting your job to follow your dreams to cutting your hair after having it long all your life to growing facial hair because beards are “in”.  For some, a risk maybe wearing color instead of their normal black.  For others it may be telling someone “I love you”.

No matter what the risk, big or small, they are important for our growth.  It is like the saying, “Nothing ventured nothing gained”.  How do you know what your favorite ice cream is, if you haven’t tried several flavors?  How do you know you won’t like flying, if you have never flown?  How do you know the person looking at you across the room is not the one for you, if you never say “hello”?

That’s just it, you don’t know.  Risks are a good thing.  Yes, sometimes we take a risk and it doesn’t turn out how we hoped it would.  But that’s the beauty of it…you are growing…you’re learning.  Is it better to risk and fall a little short?  Or not to risk and live with the “what ifs” the rest of you life?

We only pass this way once.  Don’t live your life cautiously…live it fully!  Take a risk.  Run in the rain without an umbrella.  Wear the printed shirt…with flowers on it!  Tell that special person you love them.  Do what you are passionate about no matter what people think!

Life is full of risks…go out and grab one!

Words Have Power

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Have you ever been excited and nervous at the same time?  Kinda like being pregnant or for guys asking someone to marry you…or your first job?   Well, that is what it feels like for me writing this.  I am excited about the possibility of starting something new and sharing my thoughts.  But  nervous about putting myself out there.  Can you relate to that?  I hope you can.

So here it goes.  I’d like to share a little lesson that I learned that has been helpful in my life – words have power.  Now you might say, yeah OK… that’s it.  What kinda lesson is that?   Well, I find that the most simplistic words have the most significant meaning.  I am sure you have heard someone say “Hindsight is 20/20″.  That saying has an infinite amount of insight behind it.  I won’t go into all the possibilities but you know what I mean.

Ask anyone who has ever been bullied, or been told “No” or has been told “You’re worthless” if words have power.  Ask anyone who has been told  “You are cured” or “You are my hero” or “I love you” if words have power.  If you constantly hear the same words long enough, you start to believe them.

Don’t let someone else define you by words.  You are dynamic, you are awesome and there is nobody like you!  Use your words wisely and speak things into being that are positive.  Once you realize the power that you have, the influence you have just by speaking…you will think twice about what you say.

Once I learn a lesson I make a note to myself so that it becomes a part of me.  I challenge you to use your words to lift someone up, to encourage and to inspire.  We all have power… it’s what we do with it that makes us who we are.

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