March 2, 2014
baggage, encouragement, forgive, forgiveness, honesty, insecurity, inspiration, inspirational, letting go, life, motivational, truth
I recently pinned this quote to my Pinterest board because I thought it was so simple yet complex. I wanted to reflect and meditate upon it. It made me think of how much we put on ourselves just because we do not let things go. Things like envy, strife, hate, worry, guilt, and many other insecurities that lead us to carry around so much baggage.
It reminds me of a song by Eryka Badu, “Bag Lady”. If you get a chance you should listen to the song because the lyrics can pertain to anyone. I especially like the following verse:
Bag lady you gone hurt your back
Dragging all them bags like that
I guess nobody ever told you
All you must hold on to
Is you, is you, is you
The song is a metaphoric. The physical bags are a symbol of the “mental” baggage that we allow ourselves to pick up and never put down. Although, the song is about a lady, all of us – men and woman – are guilty of carrying too many bags. So many of us are so quick to say, “She/he has too much baggage and I can’t deal with that”. Yet, we do not realize what we are holding onto.
It is important to realize that the baggage we carry affects us mentally and physically. If we carry too many bags, we become immobile. Stress can be debilitating. How can we move on if we cannot put down the bags we are carrying and let go. (Another song comes to mind “Let it Go” from the movie Frozen. Yes, it’s from an animated film, but has a great message for not only kids, but adults too).
As we move through the first couple of months of this year, let’s not collect any more bags. Instead, let us get rid of some. Let’s forgive somebody who has wronged us. Let’s forgive ourselves for something we have done wrong. Let’s stop worrying about things that are out of our control. Let’s stop comparing ourselves to someone else. Let’s stop walking on eggshells worried that we are going to offend someone. It amazes me at how much people hide of themselves so they will not offend someone else. When most of the time you are just sharing your opinion or stating the truth. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying just go out and be rude to everyone by saying whatever comes to mind – because, I am also a believer of the old adage, “If you don’t have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all”. However, what I am saying is if you just focus on you and what you are able to control in your life, then those bags will disappear.
Don’t let things get so heavy and complicated that you get buried and lose yourself. There’s no one like you and it would be such a waste to lose you because of some old baggage. Let it go!
January 26, 2014
Dream, emotions, encouragement, fear, forgive, forgiveness, honesty, inspiration, inspirational, inspire, journey, life, life purpose, motivate, motivational, Philosophy, quote, quotes, soul, Thought, truth
Have you ever read a quote and it resonated with you? Did it leave an impression on your life? That’s because quotes have a way of touching your soul.
They lift you up when you are down
They encourage you when you need support
They propel you forward when you are motionless
They help you remember where you’ve been
They keep you focused on where you are going
They open your mind to different points of view
They make you want to be a better you
They give you courage when you are afraid
They enable you to do the impossible
They help you to forgive
They make you think
They inspire you
They allow you to dream
They make you see the truth
They make you feel like you are not alone
They change your outlook on life…
Therefore, read a quote every day and nourish your soul!
January 15, 2014
character, encouragement, inspiration, inspirational, inspire, journey, lessons, life, life purpose, living, motivate, motivational, Travel
I heard this phrase the other day and thought some of the simplest phrases have the most meaning. Then I wondered if the person who said this was younger or older. What a blessing it would be to realize this when you were young. Then you would have so much more time to enjoy the journey. You wouldn’t spend so much time trying to “arrive” because you would know the beauty of the ride. You would know how precious every minute of every day would be.
There would be no pretense, or time limits to worry about. That’s the stuff that keeps us from enjoying the ride. The “I need to be married before I turn 30″. “I need to make 6 figures before I’m…, I need to make partner in 5 years”, “I needed 500 followers by the end of the month” and so on. Why do we put such constraints on ourselves? Why are we carrying needless burdens? Some may say we need to set goals in order to accomplish things. However, we sometimes confuse goals with deadlines. The things I just mentioned are deadlines because they are actions that involve other people. Whereas, a goal should be something that is obtainable by you alone.
There is so much to taste, see, and experience as you travel. Now that I think about it, I am not so sure if it’s better to realize this when you are young. They say, a fine wine gets better as it ages. Therefore, in that respect, we must get wiser as we get older. When we are young, we are just beginning the journey. Sometimes we don’t even know who we are let alone what path we should take.
I always hear people say, “If I knew then what I know now, I would have done things differently. Yet, if you could do it over, would you? (Check out my earlier post- If you had a do over button, would you use it?). Sometimes, the best part of the journey is the stumbles and falls and how we get back up. The lessons we learn are what shape and build are character.
I think we all realize life is a journey at the time that is right for us. We could be 16 or 32. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that we make the most of every moment we have in life. This ride is the only one we have. Therefore, look out the window and daydream often. Sing out loud. Act silly with your kids…or friends. Dance every day. Love deeply and live with a purpose.
I’m enjoying the ride. Are you?
January 5, 2014
determination, direction, encouragement, fear, goals, inner strength, inspiration, inspirational, journey, life, life purpose, living, motivate, motivational, new beginnings, new year, will
As the New Year begins, it is usually a time for people to start new plans, goals or make “resolutions”. Some want to lose weight, kick a habit or start a new endeavor.
I guess the New Year is a good time to start with a new slate. It is the “official” starting time to do whatever it is you want to do. The question is do you know what you want to do? Or better yet, do you know in what direction you are heading?
Yes, it is easy to say I am going to lose weight this year or I am going to learn a new language or I am going to go back to school. Yet, it is not so easily done. What makes us think that we can accomplish any of these goals just because it is a new year? Are the same reasons that kept us from achieving these goals in the past still present? If so, we must identify them so we do not sit idly by, watching days, weeks, and eventually a year pass by.
If your roadblock is procrastination (for many of us it is), then you need to set mini goals each day to keep you moving in the right direction. Let’s use losing weight as an example. Perhaps your goal is to lose 20 pounds. First we must right down our goal. Next you need a visual aid, so you can see where you are headed. You can use a goal chart and set up little rewards for certain milestones achieved. You must decide how to get going – whether it be eating differently each day or exercise. The key is to do something that is realistic and that you will like. If you set unrealistic goals then, you will get easily discouraged.
Next you need to eliminate anything that is not moving you toward your goal. If you know that as soon as your turn on the television, you will be glued to it until you go to bed, then don’t turn it on. You will be surprised at how much time you gain from not sitting in front of the television for hours. Again, there is no need to go cold turkey, just start small by eliminating 30 minutes or 1 hour of television each day. Another time consumer is reading. Yes, reading. Often times people are consumed by books and again spend hours reading and then have no time to do anything else. Too much of anything is not good for you.
Once you have gotten the “excuses” out of your path, your focus should be clear. However, you may need help to keep you moving forward once you have started toward your goal. That could be a positive friend or family member that can keep you motivated when you start to waiver. It could be a motivational quote or Bible verse that you meditate upon when obstacles arise. Whatever your source of strength and encouragement, make sure you have it before you get moving.
Now I know there are many pieces of information out there on “how to do”. They tell you the tools you need (and have to buy in most cases) and the time it will take you to complete the task or goal. However, I find that they leave out one important thing – direction. They do not know in what direction you are headed. They do not know if you have backtracked several times or are moving sideways because you are afraid to move forward but you know you cannot move backwards. There is only one person that knows in what direction you are moving – you. That is the same person that has to have the will to keep moving in the right direction and determination to stay focused on the goal. Remember you are not on a trip; you are on the journey of your life. Set your course and do not let anything deter you from your purpose. Naturally, there will be detours and breakdowns along the way, but you are not running a race, you are living your life! Live it with purpose and direction and you can accomplish what you set out to do.
December 6, 2013
confidence, debater, discernment, Glass, inpsirational, Is the glass half empty or half full?, motivational, optimistic, perception, Philosophy, reality, Thought, truth, vision
I am a firm believer in mind over matter and that our thoughts control our actions. So much so that we do not even realize when asked a simple question like, “How would you describe this glass of water?” Most people will say half empty or half full without any thought. Why? Because our perception is our reality. The way that I perceive an object or situation may be different from the way you perceive the same object or situation. It does not make one of us wrong or right, it just means we have a different perception.
Often times, we mistake someone’s perception for reality or truth. When we allow someone else’s perception to become our truth, we can never be ourselves. We start believing what they say about us and it slowly becomes our reality. Then the “living up to someone else’s perception” begins.
Therefore, it is important to learn the meaning of discernment – knowing the difference between your perception and someone else’s perception. Think of it as a debate. I am sure we all have seen a debate whether in school or on television or amongst friends. Each side has points to support their point of view in an effort to persuade the other to “accept” their thoughts. In order to be an effective debater, one must be educated on the topic as well as passionate. As soon as a great debater sees the opponent quiver or lose confidence, he is relentless in driving his point home until he wins. If you are not educated on the topics or confident in your thoughts, you will be easily swayed.
Unfortunately, many people are easily swayed and “duped” into believing someone else’s perception is their reality. If I had a dollar for every time, someone told me that “perception is reality”, I would be rich. People use perception as a tool in order to control you – to classify you. Take our glass scenario for example. If you say the glass is half full then people say you are an optimist. If you say, it is half-empty, people say you are a pessimist. Now you can choose to accept these terms or not. However, whatever you choose let it be because that is how you see yourself – not how others see you.
Besides, in the end does it really matter? In the end, the glass is half-empty and it is also half-full. Once you realize this simple concept, you have mastered objectivity. You have freed your mind! You can see both sides clearly and can discern from perceptions that are not your own.
November 19, 2013
anger, beginnings, closure, control, endings, Friendship, inspiration, inspirational, Instagram, life, motivational, People, power, realization, Relationship, Thought, Twitter, understanding, wisdom
What is closure and why do we need it? The dictionary defines closure as a feeling of finality or resolution. Do we need someone else’s approval or confirmation to feel resolved?
I never thought I would struggle with closure – and certainly not with a friend. Yet I found myself not knowing why we were not friends anymore. The communication just became one way. Then there was no reply. No reply from a person who shared their secrets, fears and aspirations with me. No response from someone I thought I knew – keyword “thought”.
Then I found the need to know why? What happen? Why was that person conversing with other friends we had in common, but not me? I told myself maybe it’s just a phase…but the phase became a year – a year of not knowing why.
Sure, there were days and weeks that I forgot about my “friend”. Yet people we knew in common would bring the person up in conversation. I would see her comments on Instagram or Twitter. Then of course the questions of why would ramble in my head. I would think why am I wasting my time on someone who obviously has no concern for me. Then calmness would turn into anger. However, who was I angry at? The answer was me.
We all have intuition. There were times in the friendship, were I thought the person was self-absorbed and did not give as much as she took. I even thought that I should slowly involve myself less with her. So why was I surprised when she stopped texting, calling and wanting to get together for lunch. I knew that perhaps this was a friendship for a season and not for a lifetime. Yet, I still needed to know, why.
Does it really matter? What is her telling me “why” going to do? Was it going to erase the time I spent on wondering? Would it erase what I felt? No, it would not. You see what she has to say does not define me. I am the only one who has the power to move on. The why would just be the beginning. The beginning of explaining and understanding and feeling awful. Therefore, I do not need “closure” because it is not the ending. I had already resolved my feelings for the friendship. I knew it was not enhancing my life. I knew that before it ended.
I forgot one important thing – no one can make you feel a certain way unless you allow it. Therefore, you do not need closure to move forward in your life. You just need to trust yourself and believe in the power you possess to live your life fully. Don’t ever let words define you – certainly not this one!
November 11, 2013
Daydream, Dream, Dream Sharing, gifts, goals, Health, inspiration, inspirational, journey, life, life purpose, motivational, optimistic, Psychology, risks
I recently read this quote and I instantly loved it. What a simple but paradoxical thing to say. We all have heard the saying “Don’t quit your day job”. However, has anyone ever told you don’t quit your daydream?
What a freeing statement. It’s like someone saying go ahead and be you. Don’t worry about that other stuff you have been doing to get by. Just concentrate on what you aspire to be…what you were meant to be. If you wake up and all you can do is, think about your dream, than it is more than a dream. It is a yearning. It is your calling. Thus, every minute that is spent on your “job” or other “gig” and not on your daydream is wasted.
Think of it this way, if as soon as you get to work or wherever it is you go everyday and you wish it was time to go home, then you need to quit you day job. If you love music, cannot stop singing and dream of being a singer, then you need to follow your daydream. If love cooking, creating new dishes and want to have cooking show or own a restaurant, then you need to follow your daydream.
So many people quit their daydream because of one person saying, “You’re not good enough”. Good enough for who? For what? Each one of us was uniquely created. Therefore, I am as good as I want to be. I am as creative as I want to be. I am as determined and driven as I want to be. I have to be good enough for me because it is my life and my dream. If I believe it is mine to have, then it shall be. If I let you tell me it I cannot have it, then I have to believe that for it to become reality. No one can make you feel anything or be anything that you do not want to be unless you allow them.
If you are surrounded by negative people, find some new friends – positive ones. You become like those who surround you. I do not know about you but I would much rather have optimistic, focused and like-minded people around me than negative complainers.
There are two groups of people – those who do and those who do not. Be one of the doers. Do daydream, do follow your heart, do laugh, do sing aloud, do take a chance, do ask that person out on a date, do call your best friend, and do eat the chocolate! Do all the things they said you could not.
The only thing that matters is this…you only have one journey across this time and space, and when you get to the end, the road you look back on is what you will call your life. Make sure it was your dream guiding you along the way or else you might look back and not even recognize your life.